Occult Uses for Yahtzee
January 1, 2023
A New Year stirs feelings of fresh starts and new beginnings, of bright omens and good fortune. Always looking ahead. Yahtzee, as the ultimate game of luck and skill, is one of the many techniques used to explore the influence of numbers on future events. Astrology, numerology, synchronicity - even the occult dark arts – join Yahtzee as divination tools for cosmic understanding. Take a Yahtzee cleanse to rejuvenate your dice mojo and connect with your trans-dimensional higher self.
It’s the dawn of a new year and, by tradition, optimism is running high. People want to improve their lives through New Year’s resolutions, whether it’s breaking a bad habit or learning a new skill. Adding to the upbeat mentality, the notion of ‘good luck’ is a powerful force as the calendar resets itself. In some cultures, a person is traditionally counted as becoming a year older at the New Year, rather than on their actual birthday. While it’s being scrapped for official purposes, counting ages in South Korea, for example, is inextricably linked to New Year’s Day.
This massive convergence of positive energies make New Year’s Day a crucial moment for transformational change. And Yahtzee is the perfect tool for the job, infusing skill and luck into a karmic dowsing rod. The game uses dice to invoke the cosmic powers of numerology. The importance of Yahtzee as a karmic indicator has been known for centuries. In fact, the legendary inspiration behind the I-Ching, the ancient Chinese mystic Fu Xi, used a rudimentary dice game as an early means of divination. This brushes dangerously close to the occult while allowing players to plumb the depths of existential reality.
Since the dawn of time, humans have tangled the concept of random chance with their quest for an indicator of future events. Yarrow stalk bundles, drawn lots, coin flips, and dice rolls have all served their roles. In the modern world, Yahtzee is an ideal way to glean information from beyond normal human perception. Extrasensory and/or supernatural forces can work their influence through seemingly random dice rolls, with Yahtzee acting as a karmic barometer into a player’s soul.
From their earliest beginnings as rudimentary knucklebone cubes, dice have been used to predict the unknown. But despite its inherently uplifting positive nature, Yahtzee’s penchant for divination can be a lightning rod for anti-dice dissent. The game’s mathematical focus on numbers overlaps with certain aspects of paranormal fields such as numerology and astrology, drawing the ire of more conservative elements of society.
But the occult deals with unknown forces, not necessarily evil ones. And Yahtzee is built on the principles of good luck and karma. So nay-say the naysayers and stay positive this New Year with a healthy dose of Yahtzee - and maybe even some fresh insights into the nature of existence. Roll the occult dice for a healing new year.
The Amazing Curative Powers of Yahtzee
Veteran Yahtzee researcher Louise Proctor was on assignment in Ecuador when she fell dangerously ill. But the natural healing properties of Yahtzee came to her rescue, leading us all to ask: is Yahtzee a cure-all? Her field report makes the case:
[In June] I began my sabbatical . . . in the lowlands of Ecuador. Years ago I made a promise to a shaman that I would return to celebrate my birthday with him and his tribe, and this was the year.
My hosts took every effort to make sure that my birthday was wonderful. It turns out my spirit animal is an armadillo. But a few days after the festivities I began to develop sores on my arms and legs. I didn’t think much of it at first, but they soon became excruciating. I was forced to leave the tribal village and my friends. Their healing waters were good, but I needed access to more modern forms of medicine. The diagnosis by a doctor in Quito was Hansen’s disease, better known as leprosy.
I was very fortunate to have caught it early and I was able to return home to London two weeks later with no permanent harm done. I am continuing to rest as I slowly regain my strength. The doctor prescribed a strict regimen of Yahtzee and it is reinvigorating me. The pills are helping but so is my doctors’ daily dice diet!
Like mystical healing waters, Yahtzee can overcome negative energies. Whether recovering from illness like Louise, or just looking for a fresh start for the new year, right now is the perfect time for a Yahtzee cleanse!
The Yahtzee Cleanse
A Yahtzee cleanse is a binge into dice rolling, using the positive power of numbers to wash out all impurities, both strategic and psychic. It’s the perfect way to bring harmony and balance back into your life and into your rolls, aligning mind, body, spirit, and the perfect Yahtzee game.
The player is encouraged in a classic cleanse to begin with a mono-sensory experience of pure Yahtzee bliss. All outside stimuli are suppressed, fostering an intimate and personal gaming experience. Forgoing food, social media, and board game travesties like Monopoly are some of the ways that abstinence will lead to personal growth. The object is to refine and refocus proper Yahtzee techniques, while allowing new strategic formulations to spring from the ashes of your tired old tactical tendencies. Solitaire online Yahtzee is a favored technique.
Following the Yahtzee isolation stage, a period of social gaming flushes the system of tactical inhibitions and other strategic detritus. Try to round up as many friends as possible to partake in the euphoric experience, whether online or around the table. Proper music, lighting, and a hearty breakfast all help set the tone. Indulge in endless Yahtzee, then review your games’ highlights and key strategies. As always, a healthy, respectful debate over tactics should be encouraged.
Intense sensory deprivation followed by an overload of social stimuli – the thrilling way to center oneself into a more carefree demeanor. The challenges that lie ahead seem all the more achievable after a full two-part Yahtzee cleanse. So start fresh on a healthier course for New Years. If you’re feeling a little low this winter, allow a little plastic cup to lift your spirits with a nourishing Yahtzee cleanse.
Yahtzee, Numerology, and the Occult
The mysterious powers of Yahtzee to heal the body and cleanse the soul have made the game an occult classic. Because Yahtzee is based on numbers, the game has become an important tool in the practice of numerology - one of today’s most popular occult fields. Other pop culture pastimes like the Ouija Board are perhaps more firmly entrenched as examples of occult symbolism in the eyes of the general the public but Yahtzee eclipses such instances in every way.
Numerology is a belief in the divine, mystical relationship between a number and one or more coinciding events. It is also the study of the numerical value of the letters in words, names and ideas. It is often associated with the paranormal, alongside astrology and similar divinatory arts.
In numerology, it is believed that the universe and everything in it has a numerical connection, and that by uncovering the secrets of these connections, one can gain insight into the past, present and future. This is often done through the use of specific numbers that are believed to hold special significance, such as a person's birth date or the letters in their name.
One form of this art is Pythagorean numerology, which assigns and calculates meaning and future projections based off of a person’s full given name and birth date. Chaldean numerology, another popular method, is derived from the ancient Babylonians.
In the modern world, the most common form of numerology uses a person's birth date to assign them a numerology chart, which is made up of a series of numbers that are believed to reveal information about their personality, strengths and weaknesses, and even their destiny. While it is important to note that numerology is not scientifically recognized or proven, and should not be used as a substitute for professional advice or treatment, the benefits derived from using Yahtzee to determine one’s lucky numbers or deeper cosmic insights are undeniable even to skeptics.
In Chinese philosophy, "li" (禮) is a concept that refers to the patterns and order that are found in nature. It is often translated as "principle" or "law." The concept of li is closely related to the idea of natural order, and it is believed that by understanding and aligning oneself with the patterns of li, one can achieve harmony and balance in their own life. It is yet another mysterious or supernatural concept in which the practice of Yahtzee can help to uncover deep-rooted secrets of the universe.
The construct of li is central to many Chinese philosophical and religious traditions, including Confucianism, Taoism, and Chinese traditional religion. It is often seen as the underlying structure that underpins the natural world, and is believed to govern the behavior of everything from the movement of the stars and planets to the growth of plants and the behavior of animals. Naturally, its power can also be observed through the apparent randomness of rolling dice.
It is this inherent aspect of entropy, or disordered randomness, that the Yahtzee practitioner seeks to break apart. A long system of repetitive dice rolls, as in a game Yahtzee, can shatter the illusion of disorderliness in the universe. The restorative Yahtzee cleanse in this case can unleash the true nature of reality as the underlying occult powers of li, numerology, and psychoanalyst Carl Jung’s concept of synchronicity make themselves obvious to the enlightened dice roller.
Reading Yahtzee Tea Leaves
It is possible to use Yahtzee as a tool for divination by interpreting the numbers rolled as messages or symbols that can provide insight or guidance. While it is not a widely recognized or accepted method of numerology, the game maintains a dedicated cult that advocates for its supernatural or cosmic abilities, in this or other areas of the occult.
These mysterious qualities of Yahtzee have caused alarm in some more conservative quarters, who feel that the game flirts too openly with the so-called ‘dark arts’ of the occult. Certain religious faiths believe that the use of Yahtzee to foretell the future is evil. Some hard-line Catholics, for example, warn that games used as “a form of divination” are “far from harmless.” These defenders of the faith acknowledge Yahtzee’s occult powers and react with fear:
“The fact of the matter is, [Yahtzee divination] really does work, and the only ‘spirits’ that will be contacted through it are evil ones.”
Fortunately for the Yahtzee enthusiast, these dire warnings amount to nothing more than superstitious nonsense. Quite the contrary, Yahtzee is based purely on the concepts of individual equality and free will. To assume that Yahtzee has no legitimate use other than as a simple amusement is short-sighted and just plain wrong. It is a powerful tool for self-awareness and enlightenment and its association with occult dark arts is really nothing more than semantic distraction.
The choice to tap in to Yahtzee’s more esoteric aspects is a decision that only you can make but don’t be deterred by scaremongers. Reject their impure speech which dictates that there is always going to be a time when it's inappropriate to play Yahtzee. Because the positive benefits of underground Yahtzee techniques are myriad and far outweigh any imagined dangers:
- Physical and psychic restorative powers of a Yahtzee cleanse
- The ability to gauge one’s karmic health and predict future events
- Gain a greater understanding of the nature of reality
- Harness the quantum energies of the universe
- Or just for good old-fashioned fun and enjoyment
Happy New Year from The Yahtzee Manifesto and keep those occult dice rolling!